Goodbye Hot Rod.....you will be missed.

Today the world of entertainment lost one of it's giants; not literally, of course. In fact, in the world of Professional Wrestling, "Rowdy" Roddy Piper wasn't anything resembling a "giant". He was of average height (just 6'0") and weight, not in particularly great shape, and in fact, wasn't even a very good wrestler.

But, oh, could he talk.

About six weeks ago, the world of pro wrestling lost another legend who could be compared to Piper in many ways. Sure the "American Dream" Dusty Rhodes was a couple inches taller than Piper, and a lot heavier, but nobody would ever have confused either of these men of being great "wrestlers".

But, oh, could HE talk.

Rhodes' death hit me hard. Way harder than I would have expected, given that I was never much of a fan of his. I was late to the "pro wrestling" party. I didn't watch wrestling when it was hitting it's peak in the early 1980's, and when I did start watching, it was WWF only. Rhodes was a longtime NWA/WCW guy, and I had never, until very recently, seen any of his classic matches against the likes of "Nature Boy" Ric Flair, Tully Blanchard or Harley Race. When he did finally come to the WWF, he was given a ridiculous gimmick of a buffoon in polka dots. He even made that work.

He was a classic "good guy". Fans loved him but I never got it; I don't think I ever cheered for him once. He was always in a feud with one of my favorite "heels"...whether it be The Million Dollar Man Ted Dibiase, Mr. Perfect, or Randy "Macho Man" Savage, I was always cheering against Rhodes. So why did his death hit me so hard?

I felt the grief; not my own grief, but the grief of everyone who ever knew him. This man was loved and revered by all. Social media absolutely blew up with condolences and sadness when word of his passing leaked out. Everyone who ever came into contact with him, even years ago, had nice words to say about him. The WWE, with whom he was still working as a trainer at their NXT facilities (where the stars of tomorrow are honing their craft), put on hours of tribute programming for him. It was SO upsetting, not because of my own personal experiences with the Dream, but because my heart ached for those who knew and loved him - including all the current wrestlers in WWE and NXT - and especially for two of those performers, his two sons Cody Rhodes (Stardust) and Dustin Runnels (Goldust). I never met the man born Virgil Riley Runnels Jr, and I never cheered for him, but I'll miss him forever.

And here we stand, just six weeks later, and we are about to experience it all again. Roddy Piper was another one of those universally loved legends. Check out Twitter today; every WWE Superstar, past and present, saying about the same thing: Roddy Piper was a legend in the ring, but more importantly, a great human being and family man out of it. The grief is palpable. Because Piper crossed over into a couple of mostly-forgettable mainstream films (although "They Live" is considered a cult classic by many), even the world of Hollywood is offering their condolences. Piper transcended wrestling. He was an entertainer.

Piper wasn't working with WWE much these days. Outside of a few random appearances, he had pretty much faded into the background....but I would imagine we are going to be able to watch quite a tribute on Monday Night RAW. And every other WWE programming this week, and the WWE network, and everywhere else.

Nobody could cut promos like these gentlemen.

They brought us in, made us love or hate them, and most importantly, made us watch. Every week, every Pay-Per-View, every time we knew they were performing. It wasn't about title matches: although Rhodes was a three-time NWA Heavyweight Champion, that was many years before I knew him. He never got near a title in the WWF. Piper was never World Heavyweight Champion, settling for only one short run with the WWF Intercontinental Championship around his waist. No, it wasn't about titles, it was just about entertainment, and few did it any better than these gentlemen.

Roddy Piper, born Roderick George Tooms, in Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, passed away last night in his sleep of an apparent heart attack. He was only 61.

Just when you think you know the answers, he changes the question.

Rest in peace, Hot Rod. Tell the Dream we said "hello".

Stanley Cup Finals!!!

When the playoffs began, I predicted the Tampa Bay Lightning to win the Stanley Cup in a 7-game series over the Chicago Blackhawks. After getting 12/14 series correct, and correctly predicting the Stanley Cup Finals participants, I'd say I've had a fairly good spring so far.

Obviously, I have no reason to change my prediction now. Lightning in 7.

Should be a great series, I just wish it started before Wednesday....and game 2 not until Saturday? Good grief, the schedule for this series sucks.

Achtung, Baby!! The World's Greatest Rock Band Is In The House.....

U2. The second show of their Innocence and Experience World Tour.

After a nice dinner we arrive at our seats and are thrilled to find that there is nobody sitting behind us.

We are NOT so thrilled that the reason nobody is sitting behind us is because there are no seats behind us. We are in the last freaking row!!! Wow.

I'm up so high I keep looking around for a stewardess.

My buddy, who is sitting in really good seats, is merciless with his taunting when he finds out where we are sitting.

"I'll send a Sherpa up to find you"

"I can't believe you get cell reception up there"

"I've never had any poor friends before"

I can't even give him grief, because if the situations were reversed I'd be saying exactly the same things.

He was also at last night's opening show and he does say that the show itself is so huge it fills up the entire arena. It better. I warn him that the sound may take so long to get up here that we may be a couple of songs behind, so please, no spoilers.

The show, scheduled for 7:30, doesn't start until around 8:45. The restless crowd starts doing "the wave". Yes, the wave.

BTW I posted that statement on Facebook at the time, and I'm sure glad I did. More on that later.

The show starts off with a bang and the band's biggest hit off their new album, The Miracle (of Joey Ramone). The crowd is electric, and so is their huge screen. If you look at the picture above, rather than one of those screens behind the band that everyone uses, they have a screen that runs horizontally the entire length of the arena. It is right above the walkway that they use to go back and forth between the main stage and the circular auxiliary stage at the right end of the picture. The show really is huge, and the sound is also excellent, even in row 845. By the time the second set starts with Invisible, I've almost forgotten how far away I am.

Seriously, the last time I was sitting in front of a wall was the early 80's, at the Pacific Coliseum, having coke thrown at my head as the Flames kicked the extra point to go up 7-0 on the hapless Canucks.

The last concert I was at where I was up this high was November 12, 1987, at BC Place. The band, coincidentally, was U2. Man how far technology has come; although that was a good show, the acoustics of BC Place were so bad you couldn't hear anything, couldn't see anything, it was almost like being at home on my couch listening to scratched records.

Kids, ask your parents what "records" are.

It is at this point in our story where the dark clouds part (and being up this high, we have no trouble seeing dark clouds), as my wonderful, awesome brother-in-law (I'm forgiving his supporting of the Canucks and Seahawks for one month) sees my Facebook text and invites us down from the Heavens into his suite!! Woo-hoo! Oh man, what an upgrade.

Now that we've arrived in the suite, we can confirm that it actually IS U2 playing, not some band of impostors. I need to sit down for a minute, as a trek from that altitude can mess with your head.

Now we have great seats, a little bit of wine, and shrimp. Coconut shrimp.

So. Much. Coconut. Shrimp.

I'm delighted that they launch into "Angel of Harlem", one of my favorites, and one that they did not play last night. And it got even better right after that, as Bono paid tribute to the one and only legendary B.B. King, who passed away earlier today, in the only way a rock and roll band knows how to pay tribute: through song.

When Love Comes to Town, the duet that the band had done with King on their 1988 Rattle and Hum album and documentary. The first live performance of this song by the band since 1993. Just awesome.

The show continued with hit after hit, finally finishing up the encore with perhaps their biggest hit ever, "One". Interestingly enough, they didn't play "One" at last night's show, which was the first full concert since 1990 that they had skipped it.

You could make a Hall of Fame level album with the amazing songs they did NOT play last night, but when you go to see a band that has been dominating the charts since around 1980, you have to expect that.

Oh, and when we got to the suite, there were three young girls in the row directly in front of us, dancing around like lunatics, singing along with every lyric. I'd say they were around 11, maybe 12 years old. I mention this because it's nice to see that in this day and age of horrible boy bands (One Direction), talentless assclowns (Pitbull, Chris Brown) and horrible hip-hop artists (basically all of them), some young people can still appreciate what great music really is.

What a show.

Here is a link to the entire set list.

NHL Playoffs, Round 3

Well I'm having a pretty good year in the predictions department, going 3/4 in the second round. Of course, since the one I missed was my beloved Flames, it really doesn't feel as good as it could.

10/12 in the first two rounds so far. Here we go:

Eastern Conference Finals

Tampa Bay over NY Rangers in 6

Gotta stick with my pre-playoffs pick to win it all, and Tampa Bay looked much better in beating Montreal than they did in the first round, so it seems like they are trending in the right direction. The Rangers will live and die with Henrik Lundqvist, and he's a pretty good guy to hang your hat on. I'm expecting a long series and the Lightning to prevail at home in Game 6.

Western Conference Finals

Chicago over Anaheim in 5

Honestly the Ducks don't impress me the way they do some; certainly Getlaf and Perry are top notch players but after that, their depth can't even come close to the Blackhawks. You can stop Kane and Toews? How about Hossa? Saad? Sharp? Etc etc etc.

If they can sweep the Wild, they can sweep this team too, but I'll give the Ducks a shot at one win.

NHL Playoffs, Round 2

I had a pretty good Round 1, going 7/8, the only blemish being the Islanders losing Game 7 to the Capitals. Let's see what happens in Round 2:

Calgary over Anaheim in 6

I'm honestly pretty skeptical about this one, as I believe the injuries to the Flames' defense has to catch up to them at some point, but I will stick to my original prediction that the Flames would make it to the Conference Finals before losing to....

Chicago over Minnesota in 5

Devan Dubnyk? OK I don't believe anymore. Yes I do, actually, but the Hawks are just too good. I think.

NY Rangers over Washington in 5

As I'm typing this the Rangers have already lost Game 1 but I made these predictions before that so I'm sticking with them. Not crazy about my chances at this point.

Tampa Bay over Montreal in 7

Another one I'm not totally convinced on, but I picked the Lightning to win it all before the playoffs began and I'm sticking to it. They found a way to beat the plucky Red Wings without any contributions from Steven Stamkos. I'm guessing he will contribute in this round.

And away we go....NHL Playoffs, round 1

Well it has been an up and down season for my NHL teams! More down that up, of course, as 4 of the 5 of them are yelling "FORE" right about now. Quite a shock that the only one still alive is the only one I predicted not to make it: my beloved Calgary Flames.

And as if that wasn't enough, they drew a dream first round matchup. Now before the Canucks fans reading this chuckle as if I'm just taking another shot at a team I despise, ask yourself this question: If YOU were a Flames fan, who (of the teams they could have legitimately faced) would you want them to be playing in Round 1? Anaheim? Chicago? St. Louis?

Or Vancouver?

Right.

Can't wait for this series. Yes, I wish the Flames were completely healthy, but we have survived with huge injuries most of the season (although I think we may find out just how important Lance Bouma is during his absence from these playoffs) so we can certainly make it through a round without him.

So here we are, my predictions for Round 1

WEST

Calgary over Vancouver in 5

The Flames lead in every meaningful statistical category (although all are close) and despite the injuries, should really have no trouble here. Sometimes Cinderella shows up to the ball and f'n dominates it....

Anaheim over Winnipeg in 5

.....and sometime Cinderella shows up late, falls down the stairs and rips her dress. I've said it all along, the Jets roster isn't a playoff team (I predicted them last overall in the pre-season) and although I think the Ducks are vulnerable in some ways, not to these guys.

Having said that, Ondrej Pavelec hasn't allowed a goal since Nixon was re-elected, so if he keeps that up, it will be tough to beat them. I'm saying he won't.

Minnesota over St. Louis in 6

Devan Dubnyk? Really? OK, OK, I've seen enough, I believe. The Blues are a stacked team but Minnesota has been great since Mike Yeo's infamous practice-meltdown and I think they pull off the mild upset here.

Chicago over Nashville in 5

Yeah Pekka Rinne is great, but Chicago just has too many weapons and the news that Patrick Kane is going to play in Game 1, about 4-5 weeks before expected, tips the scales way in their favor.

EAST

Montreal over Ottawa in 5

This was the nightmare matchup for Ottawa; they only way they can beat anyone is to out-goaltend them. Can the Hamburgler do that to Carey Price, the consensus league MVP? No way.

Tampa Bay over Detroit in 6

Here is my bold prediction: whomever wins this series wins the Stanley Cup. Detroit is well balanced, well coached, and features two series-changing forwards in Datsyuk and Zetterberg. However, Tampa Bay is a firepower machine, the highest scoring team in the regular season, and it would take Herculean goaltending from Mrazek or Howard to steal this one, methinks.

NY Rangers over Pittsburgh in 5

How can a team with Crosby and Malkin be THIS big an underdog to anyone? Well, have you seen their injury-ravaged defense? Word has it they reached out to Paul Coffey to comeback to help them out. King Henrik may not be quite back to pre-injury form yet, but in this series he probably won't have to be.

NY Islanders over Washington in 7

This should be a great series and could go either way, but I think the Islanders time is now. Washington really has a big statistical advantage, particularly in goals against, but I'm going to call this series the official coming out party for John Tavares.


So what happens next? My Flames make it to the Western Conference Finals before being dispatched by the Hawks, who come within a hair of winning another Stanley Cup, losing in 7 games to the Tampa Bay Lightning. Tampa's goaltender, Ben Bishop, wins the Conn Smythe Trophy as playoff MVP.

So now you know. Go out and bet the other way.

The Vancouver Canucks, their fans, and something that actually matters

Last evening, I had the good fortune of attending Rogers Arena, for a contest between the Vancouver Canucks and a team that actually doesn't make me want to puke, the Los Angeles Kings. While there, I was reminded of the immortal words of the great Denis Lemieux:

(in strong French accent)

"My h-allergy....to these fucking fans.....has returned."

While standing outside the arena in my Kings jersey and hat, minding my own business, having said absolutely NOTHING to any of the passing Canucks fans, waiting for my buddy who had the tickets, I was approached by a young C-U-Next-Tuesday who told me how ugly I was. Yes, how ugly *I* was. Not the jersey I was wearing was ugly (well, that too), but *I* was ugly for wearing a Kings jersey.

Now, you would have had to see her to really understand how ironic that comment was. She was wearing a blue T-shirt that said "STAY CALM AND BO HORVAT". I kid you not. You can't make that kind of shit up. STAY CALM AND BO HORVAT. Holy shit. If that wasn't enough, her boyfriend, who was at least smart enough not to chime in and make it worse, was wearing a Todd Bertuzzi jersey; and not just ANY Bertuzzi jersey, one of these monstrosities:

Yeah, MY jersey was ugly.

 I have admitted many times that when I go to Rogers Arena, which isn't that often, one of my truly great pleasures is tormenting Canucks fans as much as I possibly can. If I can lessen their enjoyment of a hockey game to any degree, I feel like I have achieved greatness.

But WHY do I feel that way? Well, the little bitch mentioned above is a pretty good example of my experience with these people. But it is SO much more than that. 

I say "FUCK YOU", to the Canucks fan who threw a full pop at me, missing my head by about a half inch, spraying pop on the wall behind me in (around) 1982. I was twelve years old, and not doing anything but cheering on my beloved Calgary Flames who were kicking the crap out of the hapless Canucks.

I say "FUCK YOU" to the asshole who threw a hot dog in my face, spilling mustard on my jersey, around the same time period. A security guard, upon being called by a nice lady, told me I DESERVED that treatment for wearing a Flames jersey into the Pacific Coliseum. Man, did I ever have nerve. This security guard removed the offending dog-tosser, but rather than remove him from the building, simply relocated him to another section. FUCK YOU, Mr. rent-a-cop.

I say "FUCK YOU" to the guy who dumped half a beer on my head, ruining my favorite Flames hat and staining another jersey.

All of these things, and a few other random threats of violence, happened to me before I was old enough to drive. Gee, I WONDER why I am predisposed to hate Canucks fans?

A handful of years ago, I bought two sets of Canucks tickets and presented them to my wife, who was a Canucks fan at the time, for Xmas. I intentionally bought tickets to games featuring teams I did not care about, Columbus and Minnesota, so as to avoid any potential conflict or incident. We were excited to get to the game against Columbus. We had great seats. Sitting about 5 rows behind us were two assholes who showed up for the game completely hammered, proceeded to get up and get as much beer as they could legally acquire, and generally make complete asses of themselves for the first half of the first period. They were so loud, obnoxious and lewd, that a young lady who had brought a very young child to the game (don't get me started on why you'd bring a baby to a hockey game) got up and left before the first period was over. I called security over and said something, and these two idiots decided they were now going to spend the entire last two periods yelling at ME, hurling insults and chanting obscenities at me. Remember, as far as they knew, I was a Canucks fan, I wasn't cheering for Columbus and had not been remotely obnoxious. Needless to say, we ended up giving away the other tickets and my wife has never been back to a Canucks game. In fact, she is not even a Canucks fan anymore (thank Heaven for small favors). To those assholes, I say FUCK YOU.

A couple years after that, I went to a Canucks/Flames game in my Iginla jersey. The Canucks opened up an early 2-0 lead, and the two jackasses sitting directly behind me decided it would be a good idea to lean down to within about a half inch of my ear, and YELL insults into my ear because I had the nerve to show up in a Flames jersey. Keep in mind it was 2-0 Canucks, I had not said a word to them, I had not engaged them at all, I had not cheered, I had done nothing except show up in an Iginla jersey. Needless to say, I thoroughly enjoyed tormenting them the rest of the game as the Flames came back, and when Iginla scored the game winner in the third period, it's amazing how quiet they suddenly got. To them, I say FUCK YOU. Actually, I already said that to them in person, while showing them the middle finger on each hand. But just for posterity's sake, FUCK YOU.

The other day, I made a comment on Twitter about something stupid that Alexandre Burrows had done. One fine gentleman responded to my criticism with this gem of wisdom: "Your mother is a cunt whore".

Hmm. Well, I'm pretty sure she isn't, sir, but I'll look into that for you. And even if she IS, how does that have anything to do with Alex "I'm going to bite you" Burrows??

And let's face it, I'm not the only one to suffer abuse from Canucks fans. It's well documented that during the 2011 Stanley Cup Finals, the elderly grandparents of Bruins player Milan Lucic were verbally harassed and pelted with peanuts. Very nice. FUCK YOU.

Any time that I mention this, I am inevitably told "oh well, that's just a few bad eggs, every fan base has those". Maybe. But this is not a "FEW" bad eggs. It's a prevailing problem in this fan base; in this city. 

Quick Jeopardy question: "The only city in North America that has seen TWO riots at the end of a major sports championship".

"What is Vancouver, Alex".

Yeah, that's just a few bad eggs. Those eggs multiplied into a riot. Twice. TWICE.

I lived in Calgary for three years. I went to many Flames games, and there were plenty of visiting fans, particularly Oilers and Canucks. Although I was never excited to see visiting fans in the Saddledome, I always treated them with respect, and so do the other Flames fans. I never saw one fight in the stands in three years. NOT ONE FIGHT. 

Of course, we all remember the spring of 2004, when the Flames came so close to winning the Stanley Cup, falling in game 7 in Tampa Bay. The Flames fans created quite a bit of controversy, setting the city ablaze, turning over police cars, beating up anyone in a visiting jers.....wait, what's that? They didn't do ANY of that? So what was the big controversy?

Oh yeah, a bunch of young girls flooded the Red Mile and flashed their tits. Oh, those crazy Flames fans.

I've been to games in Anaheim and Los Angeles, in visiting jerseys. Always treated with respect. OK my wife may disagree with that last statement, as the Kings mascot Bailey did wipe his ass and tail on her Canucks jersey, but if being playfully mocked by the team mascot is the worst thing that happens to you in a visiting arena, I think you've done OK.

I enjoy playful banter with Canucks fans (or fans of any opposing team). Just last night, standing in line at a concession, we made conversation with a 20-something girl in a Vancouver Millionaires hat and her boyfriend who were in front of us in line. They respectfully commented on my jersey and hat, I retorted back, and all was good. He was wearing a Burrows jersey so I was careful not to get my fingers anywhere near his mouth, but I digress. As they left I smiled at her and told her to "enjoy your game". Clearly, classy Canucks fans exist. But I can honestly say that I could count the number of positive experiences I've had with them on one hand, and have some fingers left over to make obscene gestures with.

Last night, the Kings opened the scoring just over one minute into the game. I stood up and clapped, as did many other Kings fans. It's possible that I might have yelled something along the lines of "WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG?!?!?!", but c'mon, that's an old joke. Seriously, that was the only remotely obnoxious thing I did all night. When Henrik Sedin was given a video tribute for scoring his 700th NHL assist, I stood up, dropped my pants and mooned the little Swedish bitch.

No, of COURSE I didn't, I stood and gave him the ovation he deserved. What a player. 

I'm not asking for credit for applauding him, just providing some context; there was little reason for anyone to be mad at me for anything I had done that night. 

After the Canucks had won the shootout, my friend and I walked up the stairs to the exit, where a drunken behemoth decided that it was a good time for him to shoulder-chuck me, while screaming "WOOOOOOOOOOO" about a half inch from my face. He did it twice, and twice I responded by shoving him back and telling him to keep his fucking hands off me. I honestly don't know what prevented this into turning into a brawl, and part of me honestly regrets that he backed off because sending a Canucks fan to the hospital would have crossed one thing off my bucket list. Still, cooler heads prevailed and I made my way out of the arena, and that was that. Honestly, this is probably the incident that prompted this blog post. I likely would have overlooked the incident with the Bo Whore-Vat from before the game. But this is the type of thing that so many Canucks fans think is acceptable. A guy who he's never met, who he has had zero interaction with, who has the unmitigated gall to wear a jersey of another team to a hockey game, he deserves to be assaulted. FUCK YOU.

Do I hate the Canucks? Difficult question to answer. I would probably say "yes", if I had to answer the question, but with a lot of reservation.

I don't even hate all the Canucks players, or members of their organization. How could anyone not respect Trevor Linden or the Sedins? Mattias Ohlund? Markus Naslund? It doesn't matter what jersey you wear, or wore. Class is class. 

I have good friends who are Canucks fans. The buddy who took me to the game last night has recently adopted the Canucks as his second team (his first team being the Buffalo Sabres; I guess eventually he got frustrated cheering for a team who has existed for over 40 years without ever having won anything.....er......nevermind. Jesus Christ, that poor sonofabitch is a glutton for punishment). My brother-in-law, a great guy who I love and respect, is a die-hard. I regularly interact with several Canucks fans on social media who are generally intelligent and decent people. It's not necessarily about the human being. 

You can be a Canucks fan, and I might like you. I might even love you.

But I hate you.

And that's never going to change.

Go whomever-the-Canucks-are-playing-tonight.